Why now...after all these years!?

The last time I wrote about my first love, I said he would hopefully be a distant blip on my radar soon...

Well apparently that ship turned around and that blip on the radar is covering the whole damn screen and beeping loudly....

My ex....showed up at my high school girls brunch on Sunday, and no one thought it would be good to warn me he was coming....  BLINDSIDED with my ex-boyfriend....

A week ago, I would have whole-heartedly said "I'm over him!"

Then he walked into the restaurant, and my heart began to race and I felt that nervous, butterfly, nauseous feeling...I haven't felt that way in years!!!  To be completely honest, he's the only one who has ever made my heart race...

In an attempt to calm my nerves, I gulped back my 1st Bellini of the day...I'm not entirely sure how many there were by the time brunch was over, but I was at least 4 drinks in when the 1st course arrived.

I tried to avoid eye-contact with him, but every time I looked in his direction, he was looking at me...

The whole table was laughing and having a good time reminiscing about fun times...but he kept adding in these references to the times we dated... *knocks back another drink*

STOP BRINGING UP OUR RELATIONSHIP!!  STOP STOP STOP!!!

You don't have the right to bring it up anymore!  You don't have the right to say "The day of the gas leak changed my life forever."  WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT!?!  What was the point in bringing up the day we started dating!?  Were you trying to just get a reaction out of me?  Were you trying to see if there are still feelings there?  Do you have regrets?  Were you hoping that there would be some indication that I still have feelings for you?

Let me take another drink...

You have lost your chance to say such things!!  You broke my heart for way too many years...You can't tell me that you love me, but that it's not written in the stars for us to be together, and then turn around and apologize for hurting me, followed by randomly telling me you were going to ask me to marry you.  How many things did you say to me that were lies??  Did you really every want to get back together with me?  Did you really every hope that things would work out?

WHY??  Why couldn't we make it past the 1 month mark?  What was it about our relationship that made you want to break-up before we moved past those first few weeks...

Did you ever really love me???  Why did loving me scare the ever-loving shit out of you!?

I loved you so much more than you deserved....that's not true...you deserve love, we all do...

We always seemed to be in a good place...but you would break my heart, and I'm not even sure why...I didn't want to "still be friends" like you asked so many times after breaking my heart.  I wanted to love you, to be with you, to give our relationship a TRUE chance.

Why do I feel like I'm 16 again?  Why do I feel like I felt 15 years ago?    Why can't I ever say these things to you?  You leave me tongue-tied when it comes to our relationship (or lack thereof)...


After all this time?   Always....

Single on Valentine's Day

Well...let's put another year in the books as being completely and utterly single on Valentine's Day...

Let's talk being single on Valentine's day...here's what it's like...

I woke up this morning, and after seeing the snow still falling outside, I remembered that it was Valentine's Day...I grabbed my phone to see if I have a work delay, nope...so while I have the phone out, I check facebook...

Cue all pictures of presents and flowers from boyfriends, husbands, and children..."guess what single people...here's all the reminders that we are not alone on this holiday!"  I click the "like" button for a few pics, but then frankly, I don't want to look at the pictures anymore...

After showering, I put on my pink shirt, heart shaped earrings and necklace, and head off to work...

Why wear the pink and the hearts?  Well, I have classroom full of "valentines" everyday of the year...We call it "Friendship Day" and we celebrate being friends...

I try my best to ignore the internet for most of the day...If I ignore it, then there are no pictures of everyone's happy love lives...if I ignore it, then it's just another day...and I don't mind being single on most other days...it's the holidays that are reminders of who is happily taken and who is single...

of course, the reminders are there in my classroom all day...children making valentine's for their parents, hearts hanging around the room, and the Valentine "mailboxes" which the kids will open in the afternoon.

I read a story to my kids called "Slugs in Love"...well, crap!  Even the slugs are in love...but I am not....

Thank goodness for the 8 little valentine's who have hugged me, told me they love me, and gave me cards and flowers...they make my single valentine's day a little brighter!

But of course there are also the reminders from the co-workers with their flower/candy/chocolate deliveries to work...yup...we get it, you're married or in a relationship...

At the end of my work day, I call in an order for take-out, drive home, eat dinner alone, ignore more happy love lives online, and I won't lie...I'm probably going to call it a night early tonight...I don't have any reason to stay up late and be reminded of all the happy people...

As Scarlett O'Hara says... Tomorrow is another day...

tomorrow the reminders will stop, and I can go back to forgetting that I am single on Valentine's day...as I have been for too many years...

Until then... Happy Valentine's Day to all the single people out there...only a few more hours of reminders!!

My day...

• 6:00am - alarm goes off, I hit snooze.
• 6:09am - snooze!
• 6:15am - snooze!
• I continue to hit snooze until 6:45am!
• 6:50am - shower
• 7:05am - get dressed
• 7:15am - put lunch in my lunchbox
• 7:20am - out the door to my frozen car...turn it on and come back in the apt!
• 7:30am - out the door again to finish scraping what the defrost didn't get off windows and off to work!
• 7:50am - chatting with Jessica at work
• 8:00am - officially on the clock at work
• 8:15am - head to pre-k classroom where my kg class is
• 8:55am - take me KG class to our classroom
• 9:05am - receive text from Jillian.... we are headed to NYC for "Wahlburgers Wednesday" with Donnie Wahlberg!  WOO WOO!!
• 9:15am - parent/teacher conference
• 9:55am - back to the classroom...clean-up time!
• 10:05am - circle time...calendar, weather, school day count, pledge of allegiance, and story (The Wombat and the Kangaroo).
• 10:30am - Reading groups....my group starts with our smart board activity, followed by handwriting and then our small-group lesson at the reading table.
• 11:00am - Art - I teach my kids what a still life painting is.  We weave "baskets" as part one of a "Fruit Basket" art project.
• 11:50am - time to clean-up for lunch!  (Chicken, Sweet potato Fries, apple, and mixed veggies)
• 12:00pm - My lunch break!  Off to the break room to chat with my co-workers about VARIOUS random items! ;)
• 1:00pm - back to the classroom, class is outside for recess....get myself bundled up and head outside!
• 1:30pm - back inside for math (taught by my co-teacher).
• 2:10pm - Science time...we are testing which solids sink and float. 6 objects float, 3 sink!
• 3:00pm - put homework and school work in folders.
• 3:15pm - snack and free-time for the kiddos.  I eat my snack as well (cheese/crackers and grapefruit) and chat with Mr. Alan.
• 4:00pm - turn the smart board on for one of my students to play on ABCMouse.com. 
• 4:15pm - practice spelling/reading words with letter cards with one of my students.
• 4:55pm - move 2 children to another room and pack up my belongings to end my day.  Chat with a few teachers/parents before finally walking out of my classroom.
• 5:15pm - head out the door to my car and drive home.
• 5:30pm - stop for gas
• 5:45pm - HOME!
• 6:00pm - dinner (omelet and blueberries)
• 6:45pm - crawl into bed to relax and watch some tv.
  The Middle
  Jeopardy
  Big Bang Theory
  Dads
• 8:30pm - begin writing this blog and continue watching tv.... Brooklyn Nine - Nine rerun
• Following Brooklyn Nine-Nine, I will watch New Girl, then probably do some reading and then head to bed!

Delayed opening for my center tomorrow...Maybe I'll take a personal day since most of my class won't be in anyway...or I could just head in and do some cleaning in the classroom!  I can always find things to clean and organize, though my co-teacher hates when I do it! LOL!!

iPod shuffle!

Blog #11 - Put my iPod (iPhone) on shuffle and write down the 1st 10 songs that come up!  This is always fun to see!

1. "One Club At a Time" - Midnight Red  (Random fact:  Midnight Red followed me on twitter the other day, and I didn't even follow them, lol!  I follow them now, just to be nice!)
2. "Bailout Song #1" - Kristoffer Cusick, First Date (Original Broadway Cast Recording)  Such a FUNNY song and Broadway show...sad it's over!
3. "100" - Howie Dorough
   Coincidentally the 1st three songs, the artists who perform them all follow me on twitter!  haha
4. "Let's Go Higher" - Jordan Knight
   He also follows me on twitter!  hahaha!
5. "Blurred Lines" - Robin Thicke (he doesn't follow me on twitter, so there goes that trend!  This song reminds me of Zachary Levi at the stage door following First Date performances)
6. "All-American Girl" - Carrie Underwood
7. "Boston" - Augustana
8. "Stingy"- Jordan Knight (feat. Donnie Wahlberg)
9. "DJ Got Us Fallin' In Love"- Usher (feat. Pitbull)
10. "Live it Up" - New Kids on the Block (the cruise anthem...if this doesn't make me HATE that the snow is falling outside even more, I don't know what does....I want the cruise to be here now!!  I need to be on the island of Bermuda, like NOW!)

What are the 1st 10 songs on your iPod...put it on shuffle and leave a comment...would love to see what you all are listening to!!

My first love...

30 Blog challenge: Day 10...describe your first love and first kiss....well this one should be interesting...

I already don't know what to say and I haven't even started writing about him...My first love is many, many years of love and heartbreak. It took me a lot longer to get over him than it really should have...but here we go...  *It also took me a long time to write this blog...I worked on it for days, and it is quite lengthy*

The song "Didn't I" by Rachel Proctor fully encompasses what my many years of love were like for him...

OK, the story of me and Gio began during my Freshman year (his sophomore yr) of high school.  Gio and I were in the same Spanish class, and we were seated next to each other for the entire duration of the year.  We talked throughout class every day...it drove my teacher nuts how much Gio talked to me.  I remember her moving Gio to the back of the classroom, all by himself one time, figuring he wouldn't talk to me or our two other friends in class if he was back there alone...well she was wrong and shortly thereafter moved him back near us...at least when he was near us, he talked quietly!  I really didn't think anything of our discussions as any more that two people becoming friends.  

Looking back now, I suppose there was some flirting going on...but I was 14/15 years old...I was not in a state of mind where I was thinking that there was a boy attracted to me.  I had my crush on someone in my own class, someone I had been crushing on for years...though that would never go anywhere!

Summer came, and I didn't think about Gio at all...we were friends during Spanish class, but outside of school, we had never hung out or talked.  We really only had ever seen each other during Spanish class, nowhere else...

We ran into each other at the movie theater one day over the summer...I'm pretty sure I was seeing a Leonardo DiCaprio movie, and could care less about this guy I knew from Spanish class!

(*side note:  I just spent an hour and a half lost in photo memories as I searched for some pictures for this blog...it's amazing how distracted you can get looking at pictures...or is that just me?)

ok, back to the story...cue, Sophomore year...

During the beginning few months of the year, my friends and I slowly became a part of a group of friends that included some Junior guys that a few of the girls were beginning to date.  Gio was friends with a couple of the guys that my friends had begun dating.  It was through this group that Gio and I became more friendly outside of being in a class together Freshman year.

I began to notice that we would pass each other in the hallway between 3rd and 4th period.  We would make faces at each other as we passed one another.  The days passed and I really didn't think anything of the faces we made at each other...at the time, in fact, I found him to be annoying...or so I thought I did...

I used to be able to remember the exact date, but now I cannot, but I do still remember what happened that day in mid-December...

It was a cloudy, cold day...I was in 3rd period, when the fire alarm went off...we filed outside, near the tennis courts, where we waited to go back into the school.  We stood outside longer than we usually do, so we knew it couldn't just be a drill.  When they thought it was safe, we were let back inside, and told to gather our things and proceed to 4th period.

I remember walking down the same hallway I walked down everyday on my way to 4th period computer class.  I passed Gio and Eric, just as I always did.  He and I made a face at each other, but his face was a little different than it usually was.  In the moment, I didn't really think much of it, but later, I would think back and realize it wasn't the usual look of "annoyance" that we always pretended, but a look of a 16 year old who was trying to work up the courage to ask out a girl he liked....

I walked into my computer class, and had just barely grabbed my assignment, when the fire alarm went off for a 2nd time.  This time, I exited the building out the front door of the school, and headed toward the grass near the corner of the school.  As I was walking with the crowd, in search of some friendly faces, a friend came up to me and informed me that Gio was going to ask me out!  My response... "Eww!  Why!?"

Not exactly the reaction you expect to have when you find out someone is going to ask you out, hahaha...but at 15, that was my reaction!

We were pushed further away from school than we ever had been, leading us all to believe that something really was wrong.  As we were walking up this hill near school, we came across Gio.  Awkward hellos were exchanged, and then my friend suddenly had someone else to go see, leaving me and Gio alone...could she be anymore obvious!?

We awkwardly chatted for a few minutes, during which I expressed that I was cold...it was mid-December and I couldn't go to my locker to get my coat.  He told me that if he hadn't lent his to a friend, he would give it to me.  His friend came by a few minutes later, and gave his coat back to him.  He immediately handed it to me.  hmmm...the wheels started spinning in my head...maybe he wasn't as "annoying" as I always thought he was, or maybe I never thought he was annoying!

I don't remember what prompted it, but at some point while we were standing there with his friend, his arms went around me.  His friend asked if we were going out.  Gio looked at me, and asked me...I obviously said yes (if I had said no, would I be writing this blog about him...lol).

We were released from school, due to a gas leak in the cafeteria.  A bunch of Gio's friends (and a few of mine) decided to go to Burger King for lunch, so I tagged along.  We also went to the mall after lunch, and hung out.  It was strange all of a sudden holding hands with this guy who I was just thinking was annoying a few days earlier.

A couple days before Christmas, we all got together at a friend's house to hang out and watch a movie, Austin Powers (strangely that would become the movie our group ALWAYS watched, haha).  After the movie, we were all getting ready to head home.  We were standing in the driveway.  Everyone else was figuring out who was driving who home, while Gio and I stood there together.  With Gio's arms around my waist, he looked down into my eyes, and kissed me....my first kiss.

Everything changed after that...we would hang out in the mornings before the homeroom bell, holding hands, and talking with our friends.  Weekends were spent hanging out at someone's house with each other.  As we passed each other between 3rd and 4th period, we no long exchanged annoyed faces with each other, but instead hellos, smiles, and grabbing each other's hands as we walked right passed each other.  I would skip part of my biology class, telling my teacher I needed to go see my guidance counselor, and go down to his lunch period for a few minutes before heading back to class.

This was the way it was until mid-January...I had everyone to my house one Friday night, to hang out.  Aside from Gio meeting my mom, things were just like normal that night.  Laughing, movie watching, kissing.

But the next week, everything changed...One Monday, when we returned to school, something was different.  It was a few days before his Junior-Senior semi-formal and things were awkward.  I remember walking past him in the hallway and he didn't look at me, he kept talking to a friend.  I didn't think a lot about it...maybe he was just really into the conversation they were having.  That afternoon, my 15 year old world came crashing down.  Gio broke up with me...I don't even remember what he said, except the line I would hear more times in the next few years from him than I ever wanted to hear.... "I hope we can still be friends."

I cried, all the way home.   What had I done?  I thought that things were going well. I got home, turned on my radio, and the first song to come on was Brandy's "Have You Ever"

My first break-up...and I knew in that moment, that I loved him, as much as a 15 year old can love someone.  The next few months were rough.  I dated his best friend for about a week, on the rebound.  I tried to be friends, but on the inside, I just wanted to tell him that I loved him, and thought about him all the time.

At my Sweet 16 party in May, I cried, as Gio danced with me to the song that became our song,  "Have you ever" by Brandy.

In June, I began dating someone else, at the urging of Gio, to move on and be happy.  For that summer, I was very happy in my new relationship.  The next fall, after the homecoming game, Gio and I were talking in the parking lot, about the fact that he was now dating one of my friends (yes, it bothered me, because she had always criticized me for dating him).  It was in that parking lot, that Gio and I expressed that we loved each other, but that we couldn't be together  because we were both dating someone.

My boyfriend at the time, figured out that my conversation with Gio in the parking lot was about our past relationship.  He knew, and told me that night, that I loved Gio more than him.  We fought that night, and I told him that I couldn't help my feelings for Gio.  He was after all my first love.  However, I loved him too, and I certainly didn't want to break up just because Gio told me he loved me.

So for the next school year, we all hung out like always....Gio and I pretending like we never told each other that we loved each other.  Though there was no denying that we loved each other, when every time we were having group shots taken, we were together...sometimes even when my boyfriend was there as well...

Those feeling and emotions that I had for Gio, carried throughout the year, and through the summer as he prepared to head off to the military.  Things between my current boyfriend and I were in a weird place.  I wasn't happy, but stayed with him for reasons which I should not have.  I remember a trip to Riverside Park (now Six Flags New England) over the summer before all the guys headed off to college or in Gio's case, the military.  I was sitting in the backseat of a friend's car, sandwiched between my boyfriend and Gio.  Gio was in charge of music selection and put a 98 Degrees CD in.  He chose "The Hardest Thing" and whispered to me that the song was for me.

How was I supposed to get over someone who kept telling me he loved me and played songs like this for me?  To this day, I can't hear The Hardest Thing without thinking of him and that car ride.

By the beginning of November of my senior year, things with my boyfriend were at their lowest point.  We were fighting all the time, and finally we decided it was time to break-up.   I couldn't pretend to be happy anymore, and I think he finally realized that we weren't happy.

I remember being on the phone with my BFF a few days later, when Gio called.  I quickly hung up the phone with my BFF to talk to him.  We chatted about random things, but eventually the topic came around to us...He was coming home for Thanksgiving, and I had told him that I wanted to see if things could work out.  We decided to give it a try.  On Black Friday, a friend of ours had a get together, and it was the 1st time I was going to see Gio, since he had left for the military.  We immediately fell back into being "us" and I was so happy to be holding his hand and kissing him again.

I went with him to the airport, the day he left...it was SUPER early in the morning, and I had to wake him up when I got to his best friend's house.  We held hands all the way to the airport, and I cried a little on his shoulder in the car.  He kept telling me not to cry, because that would make it hard for him to leave.  He played a song by Sisqo, called "Incomplete" and told me the song was for me.  How could I not love him when he was like this?  None of my friend's truly saw that side of him...

but just like before, it was short lived... in fact, it was Christmas time, when he broke my heart for the 2nd time.  He told me this time, as we walked around outside near my house, that he couldn't be there for me like he wanted to be.  He couldn't call me whenever he wanted, he couldn't be there if I needed him to be, and because of that we couldn't be together.  But I didn't care.  I didn't need him to be there like that...just knowing that he loved me and was thinking about me was enough for me.  But he was determined to break-up again...and then that phrase "can we still be friends"...my heart was crushed again!

Late in the winter, I began dating someone new...a blind date, and we had fun through the summer, but he moved, and I went to college.  It wasn't a relationship that I ever really thought would last anyway, so I wasn't heartbroken  like I had been with Gio.

I came home for a long weekend in the fall of my freshman year of college...I remember sitting on my couch watching tv, after a lazy day.  I got a phone call from Gio, and I was shocked.  I hadn't heard from him in months, and all of a sudden here he was calling me.  He asked me what number my house was...and after I had told him, we hung up the phone.  It took me a moment to realize that he was on his way over to my house!!  WHY!?  after all this time, why was he coming to my house?  I did my best to make myself look presentable, but there really wasn't much I could do.

He showed up at my door, and we hung out for a brief time.  After a little while, he sent his friend outside and told him he would be a few minutes...  He kissed me like he had never kissed me before, and a few minutes later, I told him that if this wasn't going anywhere, then the kissing needed to stop.  He told me he wanted to try again, and I was beyond happy.

A few times we had talked after that, and then I received the phone call that ended everything...all my hopes and dreams...  He told me that we needed to stop getting back together because it was not written in the stars for us to be together.  It was never going to happen, so we needed to stop trying.

He was so good at taking my heart....and then crushing it...each time he crushed it, more pieces were lost forever...that last time, I wanted my life to be over.  I didn't want to be alive if there was no hope for us.

Seeing him after that phone call was harder than ever before.  Knowing that he felt like we were not meant to be, made me never want to be near him.  I haven't really been in a relationship since then.  I've given it a shot with a few people...a few dates, a couple "let's see where this goes" situations, but that was it...

In my head, I told myself, if I wasn't good enough for Gio, then I wasn't good enough for anyone...I gave up trying!  I gave up on myself, and focused on becoming a teacher.

After graduation, I had moved out, and began my teaching career.  I had finally moved on from him..but just like always...whenever he was out of my mind, he reappeared...this time, a phone call in the middle of the night...It was probably around 1 or 2am, when I was woken up by my phone ringing.

He apologized to me for every time he broke my heart.  Apparently, he now knew what it was like to have his heart broken.  2005...he NOW knew what it felt like to have his heart broken.  Apparently all those years of breaking my heart, he was not once sad to have us not work out.

So there you have it...my first love/first kiss...

Someday I hope to meet the one who I am destined to be with, and Gio will be nothing but a distance blip in my past!

I hate winter...

As I sit here on my couch, curled up under a blanket, drinking hot tea, outside the weather is something I seriously hate...SNOW!!  There is ONE day of the year where I wish for snow, and that is Christmas.

I always remember LOVING when it snowed as a child.  Putting on the snowsuit, boots, mittens, and running outside to play!  Jumping in the snow, building snowmen, and sledding!  Now...well It's just a hassle!  It's cold, it's wet, it's slippery!  Cleaning off the car is a pain....and when the wind blows and you get the snow in your face...OH MY GOD!!  I just want to scream!

I live in an apartment complex...the company which is supposed to plow our parking lots SUCKS!  When I got home tonight from work there wasn't even a layer of sand or salt....and definitely not plowed at all...my car slips and slides everywhere when I am in this complex...

Driving in the snow is the worst...hoping that you won't slide every where...and praying that you won't get stuck somewhere with your tires spinning...

but instead of dwelling on the crappy white stuff...I want to think about places that make me happy!!  :)

Tropical Happy place #1: Hawaii:  In 2005, after graduating from ECSU, I took a trip to Oahu, Hawaii as my graduation present...   I had the most wonderful 10 days of my life, and hope to someday return to visit other islands.

so beautiful...Honolulu and Diamond Head

After a luau with one of the luau dancers: we did two luau's during our trip.  This first one was at the Royal Hawaiian hotel.  We enjoyed it, but it felt more like a Hawaiian wedding than a typical luau.  But this luau dancer was adorable! :) 

At the top of Diamond Head - what an incredible view from the top!  Our tour guide, Brian, wasn't bad to look at either!  He made every step of that hike to the top worth it.  I did my best to stay with him every step of the way!

Hiking Manoa Falls with our hot tour guide, Brian:  We enjoyed the hike up Diamond head with Brian that we changed our tour for the next day to do a hike of Manoa Falls..Being in a rainforest, it obviously rained!  ;)  It was a great hike though!  We enjoyed it, and of course, enjoyed the company!  

My other tropical happy place is on the NKOTB Cruises...Aside from the fantastic view of 5 "brothers" from Boston for a few days, there is the islands/beach fun with my favorite girls!  I'm feeling warmer already just thinking about heading off for cruise #4 in June!  Here's a look back at some of my fave memories from that past 3 cruises!

Cruise #1 - May 2010:

Umm, what!?  This is the 1st moment I meet my favorite New Kid!!  How heavenly is this!?

VIP Bracelet on the final night, my birthday!  My VIP bracelet was given to me by Jonathan Knight...*sigh*  My favorite New Kid personally gave me access to the VIP area!  I was in heaven!

 Carin, Me, and the Canadian girls!  We had such a blast on this trip! 

Cruise #2 - May 2011:

Back at Half Moon Cay with my girls, Carin, Kim, and Michelle!  Another great day at the beach, watching a concert from the ocean!! :) 

Another photo op standing with Jonathan :)

Well isn't this the truth!  I truly do wish I could stay here forever!!  I could definitely live on a tropical island and be perfectly content for the rest of my life!

Instead of a picture with Jonathan at Half Moon Cay, this year I got a picture with Danny Wood on the beach!

Cruise #3 - May 2013:  What I thought would be my last NKOTB cruise...

Island style looks good on me, don't you think?  I could definitely live my life looking like this!  I would be a happy girl.  :)

Retro Red Carpet Gala:  A quick shot with Donnie Wahlberg!  Gotta love this man, such a sweetheart!

Back on Half Moon Cay for another year!  I do love this island, and all the memories I have on it!

Cabana Fun:  Including a special cabana visitor, Donnie Wahlberg!!  Getting a cabana this year was the best decision ever!  Having a place to hangout when it got to hot was super nice!!

Reliving the memories of 2010 - swimming with Jonathan Knight again!  :)  Happy day!!

Right before he left the beach, I FINALLY got my 1st picture with Joey McIntyre!  YAY!!

Me and my cruise roomie, Codie, all comfy and cozy during a lido deck party! :) Time to watch a movie! 

Nassau, Bahamas:  Who doesn't love Senor Frogs!  We certainly had fun!  ;) 

LOTS of deck party fun!  So many memories, so much fun!

and even, an ALMOST picture with Jordan Knight! ;-)

I got off the boat, thinking that 2013 would be my last cruise...well...looks like that was WRONG...Cruise 2014 to Bermuda, here I come!  June can't get here soon enough!!

19 more weeks to go!!  I can get there!

All I need until then, is for the snow to stop!  Until then...I hate winter...

Do I fit the Taurus traits?

My birthday is May 17.  This makes me a Taurus.  The next day in my 30 blog challenge asks if I think I fit the characteristics of my zodiac sign...  I will write my opinions in red within the description.

Taurus Astrology April 20 - May 20

Taurus Strength Keywords:

- Dependable Yup!
- Persistent Yup!
- Loyal Yup!
- Patient Yup!  must be to teach kindergarten!
- Generous Yup!

Taurus Weakness Keywords:

- Stubborn  Yup!
- Laziness  Yup!
- Possessive Yeah, I guess...but only when it comes to my physical possessions.  I wouldn't say I'm possessive over people...
- Materialistic Maybe a little bit...
- Self-indulging Yup, I do things for myself

Taurus and Independence:

Taurus is not the one who ventures out into the unknown and leads the way, Taurus is the one that will follow the leader and strengthen and build upon the discovered, in other words they are the one that will "dot the I's and cross the T's". This perseverance is given to them by their stubborn streak. Taurus stubborn streak is what gives their independence. They like to do things their way.  I am indeed a bit stubborn.  I like things to be done in a certain way, and I can definitely admit to that!  They are perfectly fine on being alone, this way things get done they way they want them to be done.  When I want to get things done my way, I definitely want to be alone while doing it.  I feel like I can focus better on my task at hand, when I am alone.  Taurus is not a follower, but they are not the brave one either. Taurus is perfectly independent. With their perseverance, they get things done and can do quite well for themselves.  When I really get going on something, I don't give up until I am happy with it.  I get things done.  :) 

Taurus and Friendship:

A Taurus is an excellent friend. I like to think I am an excellent friend!  Taurus has few close friends as opposed to many acquaintances.  At a time, I did have many acquaintances, but I like to think that I now have a core group of close friends vs acquaintances. The few people they hold dear to them are guarded and protected. Their friends are treated like family and they are fiercely loyal and dependable. My friends are my family, this is definitely true!  I am very protective of my close friends.  Taurus loves to be the host or hostess. Although not a total social butterfly, they can be shy around strangers, the people who Taurus let into their lives are lavishly catered to when Taurus decides to throw a party, they decorate and present everything lavishly. Taurus will always pamper themselves and their close group of friends.  I don't do this very often because my close friends and I live so far apart from each other, but I definitely love to be the hostess, and I LOVE to decorate when I do host!

Taurus and Business:

Taurus is a strong business person. Taurus is the one who has immense perseverance, even when others have given up, the Taurus rages on. They have a knack for finance and their financial advice is prized.  NOPE, not me!  hahaha!! They know where money is to be made and have the ability to manipulate and set the path for their own success. Taurus are not frivolous spenders but they like to live lavishly and surround themselves with nice possessions and foods, which all adds up resulting in large spending habits.  Large spending habits...yup, this might be true.  ;-)  They will not spend all their money and cause their business to fail because if they do, their security and stability will be gone and this will cause them great stress.  Well I don't have a business that i could cause to fail, but I do get pretty stressed out when money becomes very tight.

Taurus Temperament:

Taurus are deeply sensitive, the slightest comment or negative remark will be taken personally and they can easily get offended or hurt.  This is ABSOLUTELY TRUE!!!  I take things very personal, and can be easily offended and hurt.   Their stubborn streak results in laziness. They can be very lazy when someone gives them orders or wants them to do something they do not want to do. They are not lazy when it comes to themselves.  I can definitely be super lazy when it comes to doing things that I do not want to do...this is something I have a hard time overcoming.  Guess it is the stubborn side of me....I am too stubborn to give up my laziness, hahaha!!

Taurus Deep Inside:

Taurus are not fond of change. In fact, is change is imminent, they get very nervous and worried. They do not like anything new because anything new is unknown and Taurus fears the unknown.  Well this is true!  I don't like change at all.  I guess this is in part due to the stubbornness.  I am very set in my ways, and don't like when things change. Taurus needs order in their lives and when they do not have order, they get very anxious. Taurus will cut themselves off from the unfamiliar in order to avoid the feelings of insecurity that arise when new experiences and situations are present.  I'm thinking that I do tend to cut myself off to avoid those feelings. Taurus do not express their feelings openly and their inner self is contained and secretive.  I think this depends on who I am with when the feelings need to be expressed.  There are many times however, where I just want to sit and contemplate, and not talk about my feelings.  I get very quiet when I am emotional. Many people do not know how sensitive Taurus really is, they hide it well. As a result, they are often emotionally hurt when the wrong things are said, they take things too personally sometimes.   As said above, I definitely take things too personally sometimes.  Taurus avoids talking about their emotions and many people never really know how they feel.  I'm pretty sure I can hide emotions so well that even I sometimes don't know how I feel!

Taurus in a Nutshell:

Taurus is the one who has immense perseverance, even when others have given up, the Taurus rages on. YUP! Solid and persistent, just like the bull, which is Taurus' well suited symbol. Taurus's have a well known reputation for being stubborn, which is not necessarily a bad thing. The stubborn streak can cause Taurus to butt heads and conflict with other strong character types. Taurus are not fond of change.  YUP! They like the familiar and routine comfort of life.  YUP! Taurus is easy going and not one to pick a fight but should some poor souls attempt to provoke Taurus, the wrath will be known, for they have a temper underneath the calm surface.  hahaha, yup!  Don't mess with the bull!  Taurus are very responsive to their surroundings. They like decorations, color, anything that appeals to all the senses.  TRUTH!  Taurus like possessions and the Taurus home is nicely decorated with lots of things. I like possessions...maybe this is what makes me kinda like a hoarder...I can't let go of things, lol!  Taurus are down to earth, they do not like gaudy, flashy or over the top things.  TRUE!  They prefer comfortable and creative settings and objects.  Definitely comfortable things...I do have tons of blankets, pillows, sweatpants and sweatshirts...comfort, comfort, comfort! Taurus likes security, in every aspect of their lives from home, to love, to career.  I don't like change, or the unknown, this is true! Taurus can be secretive, opinionated and stingy. Taurus tend to be self-indulgent and lazy, Taurus are master procrastinators of the astrology zodiac!  Queen of procrastination! They do however have a strong, persistent drive that comes to life when they chose, and no one would ever know that they are lazy. The secret to this is that their laziness is pushed aside when it comes to themselves.  YUP!

So I guess in a nutshell....I do fit the Taurus characteristics pretty well!  I'm not one to hugely believe in horoscopes and all that though.  However, according to these traits, I definitely fit most of my zodiac sign.